Yippee skippee: I get to make one of my favorite jokes now.

Per the Daily Herald of Chicago (and I believe everything I read on the internet), The Scrappy Octopus's favorite Blackhawk, Patrick Kane, has reportedly agreed to a 5-year contract extension, worth $31.5 million.

We at The Scrappy Octopus quickly discovered that there's more than meets the eye to this one.

Apparently, discussions between representatives of the franchise and the star player mounted with tension until finally, they reached a comfortable compromise.

Stan Bowman reached into his pocket, pulled out two dimes, and Mr. Kane signed the necessary documentation.



***

Oilers @ Wings tonight. I've been short on time today, but I did try to find a video of Oilers fans acting a fool in the stands, but for as hyper as their fans get, I couldn't find a single humorous video. I found some recorded celebrations, but they were all boring as fuck. I have failed you all immensely today. Apologies all around.

GO WINGS.