11 March 2012

Roller coaster of...well, it's not love

What's exciting? Seeing what these kids can do. What's not exciting? Having to see what these kids can do this time of year. Despite riding this roller coaster of win, lose, win, lose, lose, win, lose, there are some silver linings. Their losses are only by one goal, so they are not getting blown out with half the Griffins in their line-up. Zetterberg and Filppula are getting hot down the stretch. Miller, Miller, chicken diller (that didn't work how I wanted it to) is adding a little bit of scoring spice to his defensive work. And we are finally getting a good look at Smith, and I am liking what I see. Living in Madison, we got to see what he could do all the time as a Badger, and what he did was good. Right now Ericsson is polishing up Conks plunger. That last sentence is in no way whatsoever a creepy penis euphemism.

 The Griffwings are losing to the better teams by only a goal and they still smoked the Wild and Blue Jackets. So I would be worried if I were these other teams when they have to face a healthy Wings squad, which is hopefully soon. Plus, the Wings have some good kids to plug in when needed, just not all at once. Seeing all of these different lines is a little weird and is probably why we are seeing the more than usual odd-man rushes, which is one of the un-silver linings as assignments are missed. The PP is the same as it was when they were healthy. What I'm saying is, it still sucks. One of those P's must stand for 'poop'. Is their rule of thumb that only the man with the puck can skate around? It's like some bizarre form of freeze tag.

 Another benefit of these switched-up lines is seeing different guys being thrown on a line with Helm. Like Franzen. Yeah motherfucker, you gotta skate hard to stay in the play now. No more Meat Loaf on ice waiting to skate like a bat out of hell only when it suits you. Ewwww, grody. I'm am sincerely sorry for the double Meat Loaf reference. Just a weird thought: If you are meeting Meat Loaf in a formal setting, do you address him as 'Mr. Loaf'? I know I would.

 Sometimes I wonder what's going through players' heads when they are out on the ice. Like, do they have their 'pump me up' song running on repeat in their mind. I wonder what they would be....what they would be...they would be..would be.

 Pavel Datsyuk-Magic Man by Heart

 Valtteri Filppula-Sexy Back by Justin Timberlake

 Nik Kronwall-Crush Em by Megadeth

 Darren Helm-Flight of the Bumblebee by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov

 Jiri Hudler-Pimpin' Ain't Easy by Big Daddy Kane

 Johan Franzen-Everyday I'm Shufflin' by LMFAO

 Brad Stuart-Unfortunately it's California (O.C. theme song) by Phantom Planet

 Justin Abdelkader-Abra Kadabra by The Steve Miller Band

 Tomas Holmstom-Obviously it's Demolition Man by The Police

 Jonathan Ericsson-Oscar Mayer Weiner Theme Song by The Oscar Mayer Kids Choir

 Nick Lidstrom-The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived by Weezer

 Todd Bertuzzi-Movement I O Fortuna from Carmina Burana

 Henrik Zetterberg-Sharp Dressed Man by ZZ Top

 Drew Miller-Time To Get Ill by The Beastie Boys

 Dan Cleary-Der, it's Come in Cleary by Greely's Reel

 Now when you watch the next game, these songs will run through your heads as well as theirs every time they touch the puck.

 Now before I leave, I have one request of Mike Ilitch. Dear Mr. Ilitch, I think it would behoove you to get in touch with George Lucas. If you pay close attention to the Star Wars movies (and why shouldn't you?) they have this invention called a bacta tank that rapidly heals injuries. I know what you are saying, "that's from a movie, it's just fantasy". True, but if you don't believe for a moment that George does not have real working replicas of his movie inventions at his compound, then I understand how Ericsson got his contract. Thank you for your time, sincerely, Scrappy Octopus.

 That's it. I'm out. It's time to lock myself in the bathroom with a boom box so I can peacefully lip sync with into a hairbrush to Sexy Back. Let's Go Wings

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