25 March 2012

Thanks For The Angina, Hockey

That was quite a game last night. Both of them. We were flipping between two games last night. Red Wings vs Hurricanes and the UMD Bulldogs vs the Maine Black Bears.  And because of that flipping we missed two thirds of the goals scored, and there were 16 scored in total. At one point the Wings were down 4-1 and UMD was down 2-0. At that rate, if I popped Die Hard into the DVD player, John McClain would have been shot and killed in the first five minutes, thus negating all subsequent Die Hards and tearing a hole in the space/time continuum.  Thanks sports. You just made Planet of the Apes possible. And there is no way I am going to be a house-boy for an effeminate baboon named Chauncey, who I serve tea to while cleaning up all of his flung poop.

But this alternate time-line was not meant to be.  The Bulldogs came back and won 5-2, while the Red Wings dominated the 3rd period finishing the game 5-4. And there was much rejoicing. Zetterberg basically said fuck you to losing last night. Special teams are still sketchy but the Wings can drop the hammer on any team when it comes to 5 on 5. Was there a little extra inspirado with Lidstrom back in the line-up? Maybe. Was there a bit more cohesiveness with old lines being reunited as the injured return? I think so. Did I shit myself when Miller took a puck to the hand? Smells point to yes.

The conundrum the Wings' brass will face is what to do with Smith. He's NHL ready. I know he has been reassigned to the Griffins, but let's just break it down like this.  Kindl has 12 points in 51 games. Ericsson has 10 points in 63 games. Smith has 7 points in 14 games.  I'm no mathaholic, but that gives Smith my G.M. couch nod.  They are all pluses on the season. Smith quarterbacked the PP for the Badgers, so I place a higher value on someone who can play the powerplay. It would make more sense to move Hudler off of the blue line and put Smith back there for the second unit.  This is actually a nice problem to have. It means that the defense is finally fucking healthy. The specter of Doug Janik no longer looms above our heads.

The Hank-Flip-Huds line was a beast last night. This is totally your Lord of the Rings line. Zetterberg is Aragorn. Filppula is so Legolas it is not even funny. And Hudler is any random hobbit. This has been one of the most consistent lines all season.  Nyquist  with Dats and Bert was nice as well. The Thunderchief showed off his awesome summer league softball skills with his mid-air swat. It will be very interesting to see what Nyquist can do with a whole season. One of the coolest things about Datsyuk is the opposing players with the puck know he's there and it doesn't make any difference. He is still going to steal the puck. It's like he is some kind of, I don't know, a....magician.  The ghost of Houdini slips out his straight jacket and applauds every time. Miller is not Miller Lite. He is the High Life. He is your champagne of beers. He gets the job done.  Cleary kind of fits on this line after bouncing around lines this season.

This next paragraph is only for Disch, and not even hockey related. We were grocery shopping yesterday and almost done. And then I saw it.  The most beautiful loaf of marble-rye you ever did see. I believe bread is one of the most sandwich inspiring ingredients out there.  Badass Reubens are on the menu tonight. Jen and I double teamed that grocery store like Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dennis Rodman. She went to the deli for some premium corned beef and Swiss cheese, where I might have broken an old lady's hip rounding up thousand island dressing and sauerkraut.  I will lightly brush the slices of bread with olive oil to give them the correct amount of crustiness. I will amply layer the meat followed by the Swiss cheese. I will firmly press the sauerkraut to remove excess liquid, (because nothing ruins a sandwich faster than sogginess) and add that layer to the sandwich. A little fresh cracked black pepper and then the thousand island, wrap in tinfoil and heat in the oven for about 20 minutes. Bon Appetit.

There are fourteen points left to go this season. Go out there and get 'em Wings. I'm out to go watch the Hunger Games. I love biographies. And it's been a long time coming for the full story of the Takeru Kobayashi/Joey Chestnut hot-dog eating rivalry. I hear that Larry Murphy is the narrator. I am stoked.

Let's Go Wings

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