30 April 2011
HEY! I Said Knock it Off
The title was said in my dad voice. Even if you don't have kids, you probably remember someone using that voice on you. It has a tone and a timbre that is unique in that the receiver stops everything they are doing and snaps to attention. Now that I have your myopically focused attention, listen up. Stop this shit. Let us move forward.
First things first. The game. Yeah, that sucked. It was hard to watch. Were the Wings outplayed? Perhaps. Was their flow and inability to get some sustained pressure caused by some horseshit calls and non-calls? I believe so. Have I ever played in the NHL? No. Have I ever reffed an NHL game? No. I only have my opinion and replay which makes me kind of an expert, just like millions of others around the world. And the medium of blogging is just that. It is you, the writer, officially putting your opinion out in the world to see. Not only to see, but to comment on as well.
So second things second. People who are putting these opinions out into the world need to live by the old adage, "If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen". And if you want to comment on these blog posts you have to be able to stand the heat as well. None of this hit and run bullshit. From both parties. There are plenty of blogs out there for you to read for whichever team you follow. Fat blogs, skinny blogs, blogs who climb on rocks. And even blogs that still think Lidstrom is Lindstrom. So if you don't like someone's opinion on a consistent basis, don't go and fucking read it. Doi.
Thirdly. The twitter. Yes, all of this shit will eventually get to the twitter. Which quite honestly, because of the 140 character limit, is kind of the perfect place to argue. It's hard to write your soliloquy of doom in such a short space. Oh, and threatening to unfollow someone on twitter is some passive aggressive bullshit. Unfollow or don't. Don't talk about it for three days. And tweeting about how many people you unfollowed is wishy-washy. Who cares. If you are following other fanbases, especially during the playoffs, things are bound to get heated. But seriously, you should know that going in.
Here is an example. Yesterday I wrote that Douglas Murray was as ugly as a jar of smashed assholes. Somebody on twitter called me out on my mistake. He said Murray is UGLIER THAN a jar of smashed assholes. He would be right and I was wrong and I thank you for pointing out my egregious error. And I also apologize to jars of smashed assholes everywhere for even thinking of comparing the horrendous visage of Douglas Murray to you.
So in summation: Sometimes it is okay to agree to disagree. Fuck the stupid-head Sharks. Let's go Red Wings. You know what kind of calls and douchebaggery this series will bring so you boys need to play accordingly.