21 November 2012

A Thanksgiving Word From Scrappy Octopus

Right now we would be about 2 months into this years season......but we are not.  Our favorite Red Wings are playing over seas or in the AHL.  Negotiations for the CBA are not going well and it looks like this season is lost.  This really sucks the butthole of a corpse.

I have gone through the standard Zac stages of loss.

1. Dur-ness. "That was an entertaining Stanley Cup Finals. Now they can get down to business and hammer out this new CBA so we can have training camp, pre-season, and then a sweet new season.

2. Pissed-ness.  Ummm, hello. It's the end of July and shit doesn't look too good. Come on now guys.

3. Are you fucking kidding me.  No training camp and pre-season is cancelled.  You guys are a bunch of fucking douche-ass fucks. Well, better call Direct TV and cancel Center Ice.

4. Burning Rage of a Thousand Suns. Regular season games start getting cancelled.  I am a seething inferno as a curtain of red lowers before my eyes.  I want to drink the blood of my enemies in front of their families from a golden chalice.

5. Whatevs. I got shit to do.

I am not happy about this. I want to punch Bettman. No. I want punch Bettman as hard as I can. Actually, no. I want to punch Bettman as hard as humanly fucking possible and laugh as his head explodes in a red mist.  Whatever side you take, it doesn't matter. THE FANS LOSE. We buy the merch. And we buy the tickets. Don't get all pissy, owners, when we can't do that because you are demanding the first born from each player and all the unicorn rides you can handle. Don't cry to us when your team folds because you fucked up. People are starting to not care. Those people won't come back. And you have nobody to blame but yourselves.

But fuck all of that. I want every Red Wing fan to have an awesome Thanksgiving. I want every fan of any NHL team to have an awesome Thanksgiving. I enjoy talking to each and every one of you. I am thankful to have you in my life. We will get hockey back someday. For now I will go to high school and college games. Because I love hockey.

Happy Scrappy Thanksgiving.

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